Soapbox Time

This post may not be the "lighter" post I promised, but I have high hopes that it will make the wallets of a few misguided idiots...I mean, people...a whole lot lighter after reading this.

I have no illusions about the number of people who read this blog (thanks, Mom - you rock!), but my hope is that the few who do will pass on the following sentiments to others in their immediate circles. My topic for the day concerns wants vs. needs and who gets to pick up the slack when someone decides that they want something but don't actually want to pay for the whole thing: in short, tipping - how much should one tip at a restaurant, and can you actually afford to go out to eat?

Lest I seem to have stepped outside my area of expertise (whatever that is, if I even possess one), let me say that I believe it comes down to one simple and profound principle: generosity.

Recently, my mother-in-law, a long-time employee of a certain chain restaurant we'll just call "Snapplefleas," informed me that she had recently been told by a patron that the state of the economy allowed for a decrease in the regular tipping percentage - they only had to pay 10%. Yes, you read that right - this person decided that they had enough money for a fairly good meal, but not enough for a generous tip. Does this sound right to you??

Because I could go on and on about this, I'll keep it brief: if one does not have enough money to pay for both a meal and a 20% (yes, a 20% - NOT 15%) tip, one does not have enough money to go out to eat at that particular establishment. The "state of the economy" does not allow for people to continue to stuff their faces and short the service that brought such stuff to them in the first place. If a sacrifice is to be made, it should NOT be at the expense of someone else's livelihood. Determining that the belt must be tightened as long as it isn't your belt is one of the cheapest, most odious and ludicrous things I have heard in the past 10 minutes.

Maybe that wasn't so brief.

Nation, there are several facts we must take into account when determining whether or not we can afford to go out to a restaurant in which tipping is expected, and foremost among these reasons is the question of whether or not the tip can ALSO be afforded. If not, you just don't have enough money to go out and eat at that restaurant! It's like determining that you have enough money to pay only so much for a product and then asking the retailer if he will swallow the rest of the cost just so you can have the privilege of owning something you didn't really need in the first place. Sound stupid? IT IS!!

Lest I continue to digress in a cynical fashion, let me put forth a thought: since the "state of the economy" has been called into question, shouldn't we take every opportunity we can to help other people? A few lesser-known facts concerning the restaurant business might be useful here.

First, the wait staff at a restaurant does not get paid minimum wage. Since tips are part of their regular income and not just an added bonus, it would be much more kind to consider giving a generous tip as the rule and not the exception.

Second, one should remember for what you are tipping: a percentage of the check, yes, but also for service. A likely scenario that we may all have been guilty at one time or another: you and a group of friends decide to go out for dessert. Although your friends order desserts, you decide that you don't have all that much money and so you order a Coke. You and said friends stay at the restaurant for a couple of hours, and in that time the waiter refills your drink 3-4 times. When the bill comes, should you pay only 15% of the cost of the drink (say $1.75) or should you take into account that someone refilled it several different times for you? Better yet, what if you just ordered water but it was refilled the same number of times? Some things to think about.

Last: although some might short a waiter (sorry for the constant use of the masculine term - please consider all waitresses as also being implied herein) for what they determined was bad service, that is not really for us to decide. Etiquette dictates that a full tip should be paid but the manager should be sought out and spoken to about the issue. After all, we all have bad days. Maybe you happened to get the waiter who is the single mom trying to make ends meet who just received a 10% tip from her previous patron. That might make me a little less happy and a bit more preoccupied, too.

The lesson here, I think, is clear: please remember to be generous, people. It's okay to stay home and eat or patronize the nearest Burger King (a tip-less establishment) if you can't afford the whole experience of dining out. And if you can afford it, making someone else's life a little better that night has rewards that far outweigh the slight hit your wallet might take.